Your textbook taught you to say “How do you do?” Then you arrived in Britain, said it to a bus driver, and he looked at you as if you’d stepped out of 1952.
Textbook greetings aren’t wrong. They’re just dressed for a wedding when everyone else is in jeans. Here’s what British people actually say when they meet, and, more importantly, how to reply without accidentally describing your last visit to the doctor.
Textbook English vs. Real Life
On the left, what your coursebook taught you. In the middle, what you’ll actually hear. On the right, what you need to know.
| Textbook | Real life | What to know |
|---|---|---|
| Hello, how are you? | You alright? / Alright? | A greeting, not a health check. Reply in five words or fewer. |
| I am fine, thank you. And you? | Not bad, you? / Yeah, good thanks. | “Not bad” is high praise in Britain. Nobody is ever “fantastic” before 10am. |
| How do you do? | Nice to meet you. | Very formal and rarely heard. Save it for meeting the King. |
| Good morning. | Morning! | Brits drop the “good”. It’s not personal; it’s just early. |
| Hello. | Hiya! / Hi! | Friendly and informal. Fine with friends, colleagues and the woman in the corner shop. |
| How are you? (to a friend) | How’s it going? / How are things? | Same rule: the correct answer is short and bounces the question back. |
| It is nice to see you again. | Long time no see! / Good to see you! | For someone you haven’t seen for weeks, months, or since the last family funeral. |
| Hello, everyone. | Morning, all! / Hi all. | Walking into an office or a group chat. Wave optional. |
| Please come inside. | Come in, come in! | At the front door, always said twice. The kettle is already on. |
How to Answer “You Alright?”
This is the one that catches everyone out. A British person asks “You alright?” and the learner panics. Do I look ill? Have I done something wrong? Should I sit down?
Relax. “You alright?” just means hello. It works a bit like “How are you?” in American English: nobody wants the real answer. There are three rules:
Keep it short. “Yeah, good thanks.” Done.
Bounce it back. Add “you?” at the end. They’ll say “Yeah, not bad.” Also done.
Don’t stop walking. Often the whole conversation happens as you pass each other in a corridor. If you stop to give a proper answer, you’ll be talking to their back.
If you really aren’t alright, that’s fine too. Just know that “Not too bad” is the British way of saying “terrible, actually.”
Mate, Love and Other Things Brits Will Call You
Greetings often come with a friendly word attached. Don’t be alarmed; you haven’t been adopted.
“Alright, mate?”
Mate means friend, but people use it with strangers too: the taxi driver, the man behind you in the queue. It’s friendly and informal.
“Hiya, love!”
Especially common in the north of England. The woman at the bakery calling you love is not flirting with you. She calls everyone love. She called the delivery driver love. She’d call the King love.
What About “Hey” and American Greetings?
Quick reassurance: “Hello”, “Good morning” and “How are you?” are never wrong, in the UK or anywhere else. They’re the safe, textbook-correct choices. They just sound a little more formal than everyday British speech, in the same way “greetings” sounds more formal than “hi”. Use them whenever you’re not sure, and nobody will think twice.
“Hey” is common in Britain too, largely thanks to American films and TV. It sits somewhere between “Hiya” and “Alright?” in formality, and works well with people around your own age.
“How you doing?” (dropping the “are”) is the more American version, popularised by shows like Friends. British speakers are more likely to say “How’s it going?” or simply “Alright?” “How are you doing?”, with the “are” included, works fine in Britain too, but sounds a touch more careful, almost like you actually want a real answer.
A few other American greetings worth recognising, since you’ll hear them in films even though Brits rarely say them: “What’s up?” (informal, roughly the American “Alright?”), “Howdy” (very regional, associated with the American South, essentially unheard of in the UK), and “Good to see you” (used on both sides of the Atlantic, though Americans also use it as a parting phrase: “Good seeing you”).
Regional Greetings You Might Hear
Britain is small but has a lot of opinions about how to say hello. A few you might meet on your travels:
- Ay up!
- Hello, in Yorkshire and the East Midlands. Not an instruction to stand up.
- Now then!
- Also Yorkshire. A complete greeting, even though it sounds like the start of a sentence.
- Wotcha!
- An old London greeting, now used mostly by people over 60 and people trying to sound like they’re in a Guy Ritchie film.
You don’t need to use these yourself. Just recognise them, smile, and say “Hiya” back.
When the Textbook Is Right
Now for the twist: sometimes the formal version is exactly what you want. Use “Good morning”, “Hello” and “Nice to meet you” in job interviews, business emails, meetings with people much older than you, and first meetings with your partner’s parents. Save “Alright?” for the second visit.
Test Yourself
Frequently Asked Questions
Not at all. It’s one of the most common friendly greetings in the UK. It just means hello, and it doesn’t mean you look unwell.
Rarely. It’s very formal and sounds old-fashioned in everyday life. If someone does say it, the traditional reply is “How do you do?” back. It isn’t really a question.
It’s an informal way to say hi. According to the Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries, it dates from the 1940s and started life as a squashed version of “How are you?”
No. It’s correct and polite, just a bit more formal than what friends say to each other. It’s a safe choice when you’re not sure.
Discuss: What’s the greeting that confused you most when you first heard it? Tell us on X at @EnglishStudy.
Further Reading
Now you can say hello, learn how to say thanks: Different Ways To Say Thank You. For more British oddities, try Pinch Punch, It’s The First Of The Month! and Keep A Stiff Upper Lip, or browse everything in British Culture.
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