English Idiom – You can’t have your cake and eat it.
You can’t have two good things when getting one means losing the other.
Sam has wanted a dog for years. A big, fluffy one, please. But Sam doesn’t want to walk it in the rain, doesn’t want hairs on the sofa, and definitely doesn’t want to get up at six on a Sunday. Sam’s mum puts down her cup of tea and sighs: “Sorry, love. You can’t have your cake and eat it.“
We use it when someone wants all the good parts of a situation and none of the bad parts, or wants two things that simply can’t go together.
Wait, Why Doesn’t It Make Sense?
Lots of learners (and plenty of native speakers) are puzzled by this one. Why can’t you have your cake and eat it? You have it, then you eat it. Easy!
The trick is that have here means keep. Once you’ve eaten your cake, you don’t have it any more. You can’t keep it on the plate and eat it. Choose one.
In fact, the older version said it the other way round, which makes the meaning clearer: “eat your cake and have it”. In 1538, the Duke of Norfolk wrote in a letter that “a man can not have his cake and eat his cake”, and in 1546 the writer John Heywood asked, “wolde you bothe eate your cake, and have your cake?” The “have it and eat it” order only became the most common one in the 20th century.
British vs American
In British English, people usually say it as a warning: “You can’t have your cake and eat it.” Americans often add too at the end: “You can’t have your cake and eat it too.” Both are correct, and everyone understands both.
How to Use It
- As a warning: “If you want to save for a house, you’ll have to stop eating out. You can’t have your cake and eat it.“
- About someone else: “He wants a well-paid job but doesn’t want any responsibility. He wants to have his cake and eat it.”
- In the -ing form: “She’s trying to have her cake and eat it, and it isn’t working.”
- As a question: “Can we really have our cake and eat it this time?”
- About yourself, with a smile: “Working from the beach? For once, I’m having my cake and eating it!”
Similar Expressions
- You can’t have it both ways: almost exactly the same meaning. “You can’t complain about the noise and then throw a party. You can’t have it both ways!”
- You can’t have it all: you can’t have every good thing in life at the same time.
More cake idioms: something easy is a piece of cake or a cakewalk, and someone looking very pleased with themselves is like the cat that got the cream. For more, browse our food idioms.
Learn More
Look it upHave your cake and eat it – Cambridge DictionaryCambridge DictionaryWhat is an idiom?
An idiom is a word or phrase that is not taken literally. An idiom is an expression that cannot be understood from the meanings of its individual words, but has a separate meaning of its own.
Frequently Asked Questions
It means you can’t have two good things when getting one of them means losing the other. Once you eat your cake, you don’t have it any more.
Both are correct. British speakers usually say “have your cake and eat it”. Americans often add “too” at the end.
“You can’t have it both ways” means almost exactly the same thing.
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